November 2009
THE LAST POST. These are my last writings for now....
“Media first, and we were watching the Young Ones in our sitcom research. One of...”
– ON THIS DAY: 26th November 2007
Phrases that Everyone is Sick of, But are...
tumblarity:
“Best thing ever.”
”_______ is everything that is amazing about ________.”
“This totally takes me back to (insert obscure-sounding year between 1982-1998), when I was (insert “cute” story about subject’s youth intended to cast them as adorably dorky, quirky and intelligent).”
Watchfringeelements:
Immigration is ImmiGREAT
See morel like this at Fringe Elements
It’s somehow more hilarious by how serious it is
I'm amazed
sixfootfour:
iforgotyourname:
…That Fleet Foxes have a song called Oliver James.
Amazing.
yay
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=41HarInmUxk Oliver James, washed in the rain… On second thoughts, this is more hilarious haha http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fz-HhfVZRYM
Click here and follow my big bro :) →
and his photo blog if you like
http://www.iamthelighthouse.com/ →
Everyone is wondering where my username is from. Actually, no one could care less. Even so I found this website the other day, which made laugh. ‘The Lighthouse’ is not based on Jesus. I don’t believe myself to be Jesus, since he died a long time ago (or possibly didn’t exist). Here is the username in its original context:
I constantly generate positive powerful thoughts...
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'Terrorism that's Personal' →
This article is horrific, and similar to what I’ve already learnt about the treatment of women in the Middle East. While many think that women are better off now without the Taliban, think again.
While these pictures are not from Afghanistan but Pakistan, this kind of domestic violence is still happening in the glorious days of America’s ‘democracy crusade’. In fact, even...
WatchIt’s difficult to describe in words the genius that is John Cooper Clarke. A recent Independent Review article (thanks MP) stated “With his wit, unique poetic invention and gift for observation, Cooper Clarke is, I would argue, the greatest talent of all to emerge from his generation in Manchester.” I recorded this at his live show, performing the infamous ‘Evidently...
Let Ringo take the vocals for once! Would you like...
“I think you should give a shout out to me one day. You wouldn’t be the...”
– The Incomparable Marcus Prouse
Computers Are Useful
After two days and various software techniques, my PC failed to rip an album that I bought legally. The answer? I had to download the album illegally just to get it in mp3 format. Why do I bother with legal methods again?
The Original Hedonists
“Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.” - George Bernard Shaw, Irish dramatist & socialist (1856 - 1950) It seems that we’re only just reaching the age at which we can appreciate life. My nostalgia sense is tingling every day, and when I find the forgotten programmes I used to watch on TV I re-watch them with unending devotion, to finally...
The Picnic
philhather:
i-am-the-lighthouse:
So if evidence was needed, I’ve been introverted for a long time. I love that I still have my ability to sustain myself. If I needed other people in those days, they would’ve doubtless fallen out with each other or taken over the game for their own purposes. I still live for family and friends, but no one needs to tell me everything’s alright. In the end, I’ll...
The Picnic
when I was 6 or 7, my best friend at school was called Andrew. We used to play imaginating games like ‘Policemen’, where he rode the police motorbike, I drove the car and we both tracked down the robbers. Sometimes we had to work together, and the bike went in the boot of the car and we rode together to catch the perps.
One day Andrew wasn’t in, so I didn’t have anyone to...
Martin Sinclair-isms
philhather:
i-am-the-lighthouse:
Here are some delightful musings of RS teacher, Martin Sinclair.
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[impersonating an elderly woman’s voice] “Why are you listening to that Muslim shit?!”
haha, I think I’ll add in the trousers round ankles one, even though none of us were there. It’s too wierdly hilarious.
“Don’t waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes...”
– My favourite parts of Wear Sunscreen, perhaps the most quoted advice column ever written. I’m pretty obsessed with it, it’s an amazing piece of work. Find it set to music by Baz Luhrmann & co here, based on this Mary Schmich column
Martin Sinclair-isms
Here are some delightful musings of RS teacher, Martin Sinclair.
Do you feel like you’re in a jungle of learning, knocking down trees with your machete?
If you feel like what I’m saying is rubbish, just stop me and say ‘this is bobbins.’
It’s like that Dylan song, “God said to Abraham / kill me a son / Abe said ‘man you must be puttin’ me...
Why I Love Anti-Drug Propaganda
Q: What’s so bad about a little smoke with friends? A: In the eyes of the law, passing a spliff is seen as DEALING. - The ever-informative ‘Home Office Student Survival Guide’.
“I have argued that every human being is born with an innate drive to experience...”
– Andrew Weil, M.D.
The Simpsons From Memory
Shopkeeper: The doll is cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
Shopkeeper: But I also sell frozen yoghurt, which I call 'fro-ghurt'!
Homer: That's good!
Shopkeeper: The froghurts are also cursed.
Homer: That's bad.
Shopkeeper: But you get a free choice of topping!
Homer: That's good!
Shopkeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate.
Homer: ...
Shopkeeper: That's bad.
Beatlemania 2.0
I’m guilty of an unhealthy obsession with The Beatles. Just recently it’s become a universally loved tradition of our classic cruises. I’ve never been one to say that The Beatles are separate from the normal critical analysis of music. But let’s face it, they are, and I’ll tell you why.
They were one of the most successful bands in history, but much more than that...
A Blessing and a Curse
The ability to think is both the blessing and curse of the human being. Driven by basic instinctual drives, the non-human animal gains no better satisfaction than the fulfilment of it’s nutritional, reproductive and sleeping requirements. But the human has an entirely separate instinct, based on its ability to regard itself as an existing mammal. I identify this as the need to regard itself...
This is just something I threw together a while...
WatchA collection of clips from when we were extremely cool
Arguments for Nuclear Disarmament →
As if arguments were necessary, here are some examples of the horrors inherent in weapons of mass destruction.
This Weather is a Masterpiece
Today the elements turned against us, and as Martin Sinclair rambled in RS last lesson, the sound of the wind in the trees was almost deafening. He said he was a qualified astrologer, and that my star sign was either an alcoholic or a poet. Bit of both? By the time I got out there it was like the dramatic opening scene of a movie, where the protagonist struggles through the incredible volume of...
The Making of Geniuses
ON THIS DAY 13th November 2008:
Rob: zoooooooooooooom
Marcus: zooomy ga ga
Rob: New! A load of rubbish - a surprise package of mystery items specially included for the mentally challenged
Marcus: Boo- the sheep moved to the left of the field
Rob: the sheep lies in a pool of blood
Marcus: the sheep fainted from lack of friends
Rob: the sheep wrote his memoirs but had it ghost written by a little known piglet
Marcus: the piglet befuddled by rumours of sanctity of the sows innocence?
Rob: there was a scandal in the rain when the sow's elderly father returned almost lifeless from the tyranny of the modern world, stood against the wall opposite the barn, and finally collapsed in ultimate desolation
Marcus: was he desolate when the swift wind came and took his life away?
Marcus: and peace followed him to what was gooood
Rob: there is proof that death is wonderful but you have to believe
Marcus: the sows father had no capacity to believe
Marcus: so religion is shit
Sifting through the old archives, I found evidence of the old prose and madness sessions. This is our genius: )
Night of Glorious Kings
The arrow shoots slower than the bullet But with far superior harm A volley must create the zealot And the same must restore the calm
Question not the wisdom of a gentleman As the veneer of consciousness falls A quest must purify the sentiment And the same must value the rules
This night, Night of Glorious Kings With the memories restored A song we must labour to sing And the same be captured,...
Listen to this song and think about the future....
Re: The Graveyard of Empires
panchomanyeti:
Here dead we lie
Because we did not choose To live and shame the land From which we sprung. Life, to be sure, Is nothing much to lose, But young men think it is, And we were young.
-A.E Houseman
The Daily Mail regularly talks of a “Broken Britain”, but should take a closer look at the impact our troops are having on Afghanistan, and as such ask themselves whether they would...
The Origin of Man
This title seemed the apt wordplay for such a random thought. I talk not of the human race but of the consistent use of the word ‘man’ in most sentences by myself and others; sometimes it’s as many as three times per sentence. It is an epidemic. It was the dawn of 2008, and of a new age of parties, exams and new beginnings. ‘Twas New Years Eve in fact, testing the...
Re: Stay out of trouble
beachbaby:
To end on a bad note - I watched the fictional documentary on Gary Glitter’s hanging last night and let me be clear; I sincerely hope that no one I’m close to or who reads this supports the re-introduction of the death penalty in the UK. I was completely disgusted to read that 54% of British adults support capital punishment and if it was ever reinstated in the UK I’d find it more...
Can't Beat Happiness
When you need to have a laugh you can’t beat your friends. When you start to reminisce you can’t beat your memories. When you remember the good times you can’t beat your life. When you act with good intentions you can’t beat your soul. And when you laugh so much it hurts you can’t beat happiness.
“Trop de sang sur le mur
Trop de mur entre les pays
Trop de pays dans...”
– This was written on a trolley park, outside a random supermarket in France. Recently I found it to be lyrics by Damien Saez, a rather whiney number called ‘Solutions’. The guy who copied them up clearly agreed with these anarchist ideas; there is some truth in it but that’s not the...
“I can’t even remember what’s Ben’s like?!”
– Phil on Halloween 09, direct quote
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