We believe that happiness lies in the attainment of not just close family ties, fulfilling friendships or personal relationships. We strive to succeed in all three fields, as if the combination is the only true path. However, this idea is detrimental of each, and I’ll tell you why.
Our need to strive for personal relationships are at the expense of other extremely important sources of love. Most people would agree that the bond between friends is the strongest bond of all. Most people trust and respect their friends more than anyone. So why do they take this for granted?
Love is just love, regardless of the source or the intimacy. People shouldn’t wait in desperation for the next relationship, as if they have no worth until that time. To have the love of our friends and family is of such higher meaning, and is a support system we often overlook.
As over-quoted as it may be, John Lennon once sang that all you need is love. But rather than the objective being success in relationships, it speaks of a universal mindset more prevalent in the 60s than today. All you need to do is love the people around you, and all you need to feel is the love of other people. Love is about valuing the worth of people, the strength of their convictions, the facets of their personality and the complexity of their hopes and dreams.
All you need is love, not a certain kind of love. Relationships aren’t the greatest extent of love. Admiration people have for you is love. Trust people put in you is love. Care that people feel for you is love. Confidence you instil in yourself by recognising your value as a person is perhaps the most useful love of all.
As I should be making clear, happiness does not come from relationships exclusively. In retrospect, at the end of one such encounter, the most important memories are the caring devotion of the person and the fun of the good times. But no more devotion is shown than that of friends, and no greater fun. I would be a fool not to recognise the physical difference here, and the fulfilment of the most basic human instincts. But does that make us happy? Human beings are far more complicated than to be in a permanent state of happiness as a result of physical contact with other people. In fact, that concept seems quite odd.
Love doesn’t come in one form. It needn’t be collected from friends, family and partners as if there are requirements for the complete set. We needn’t worry about when acquaintances will become friendships and when friendships will become relationships. Life isn’t about jumping through those hoops, completing those objectives, or getting to the next stage. Life is about making people happy, caring for each other and hoping that the good we do is returned to us in time.
So forget when the next relationship is coming. All you need is love.
this doesn’t really look like him but you can’t see what I mean about the glasses lol http://photos-d.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc3/hs434.snc3/24975_1373845429896_1344620269_1046209_317611_n.jpg
Yes this is sad, but English is a crazy language. Source: http://www.beautifulperth.com/dumbenglish.html
1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
12. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
13. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
14. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
15. They were too close to the door to close it.
16. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
17. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
18. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
19. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
20. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
21. Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
I just realised my 2006 diary has quite a few classic drama lessons in.
Have a read of some year 9 hilarity. These are just those from January and February, I’m not made of free time.
Drama, we acted out the talk show we scripted last week, where I ate a baby, and ended up shooting Glen the dad, Sam the host and Phil the audience member.
First lesson was drama, where we were to perform a scene using only a nonsense word or phrase. We had two: “bread and butter” and “fish and chips”. We were supposed to do an exam skiver in a grocery store, but we were allowed to change it so we did. It ended up as a bank robbery, with me pleading “BREAD AND BUTTER!! FISH AND CHIPS!!” As I was shouted at and pushed to the ground. Of course, as in every production by Sam and myself, everyone ended up dead. I was shot for making too much noise. Sam got out an SMG and fired randomly, killing Alexis and being killed by David. David and shopkeeper Marcus then killed each other. All ad-lib, by the way.
As hyper and unpredictably dangerous as our drama lessons are, we still came up with something. Phil went mental shouting for sweeties and a paramedic played by me came and gave him drugs. Then I heavily dosed up Sam, Glen and myself with a surreal anti-depressant, causing a cult of junkies to forever crawl the floor groaning ‘JOIN US!’ and grabbing peoples’ legs.
For more drama lessons, click the tag below.
It was Glastonbury 2009, turning the corner to the West Dance tent, when I heard what sounded like The Killers’ classic ‘Human’. In reality it may have been as different as Pete Tong. But PH said he loved the song because it was about loads of 90s raves. Suddenly, after an enternity of trying to understand the lyrics, I finally understood.
Are we human?
Or are we dancer?
My sign is vital
My hands are cold
And I’m on my knees
Looking for the answer
Are we human?
Or are we dancer?
To the untrained eye, it certainly appears like a mass of nonsense. But it’s a state of mind. In the huge crowd, especially when chants and Mexican Waves break out, it is easy to believe that everyone is acting as if one entity. The reason ‘dancer’ is singular, I think, is the same reason that ‘human’ is. It’s implying that dancer and human are different species, and it’s difficult in the heat of a crazy gig to know which we are.
All of a sudden the anomalies such as ‘my hands are cold’ fell into obvious concepts.
We were watching bands every day of Glastonbury Festival (aside from the Wednesday) and I spent a lot of time with my hand in the air, part of the crowd, often punching the beat out with my hand like a gun, in a manner that seemed to perplex Mike Skinner, AKA The Streets. But after some time, your hand starts to miss out on that vital blood circulation, and become cold. Just as Brandon Flowers described his hands being cold.
Other than that it’s fairly clear that the music is slightly like trance, with the smooth strings, repeated riffs and hard drum-line. As for all the other stuff? The challenge is to find out.
**400th post** yeahhhhhhhhhhh
I actually want to murder Matt Belamy in the most brutal and illegal way possible
It has been put to me that there are no noticeable downsides to the legalisation of prostitution. I was hardly in the ideal situation to respond, seconds from being dropped at my house and not in the soberest of states.
Therefore, please accept my full rebuttal.
1) I do not believe that women exist for my benefit, and that money gains my control over them. Sex is the most intimate thing that two people can possibly do, so to carry it out under total anonymity seems to dehumanise the concept, as if the drive to reproduce overrides the largely monogamous ‘mate for life’ culture of humanity.
Otherwise why do relationships have to progress towards sex when a level of commitment and trust is gained? What is the purpose of intimacy, when what could be crudely seen as the prime objective can be achieved in brothels of the darkest back alleys of town? Why bother with any level of human sophistication when animalistic desires inherent in the most basic life-forms can be gained regardless? Just as the rapist is wrong to fulfil his drives with whoever and whenever he wants, so too is the customer at the brothel. We are more civilised than that.
2) Anonymity doesn’t just speed up these encounters. It also provides no knowledge of why the person has been driven into prostitution. As far as I know, most fathers would not like their daughter being exploited in such a way. It is thought of as a morally, or at least socially, questionable line of work. BUT it can be the highest paid job available to a woman with no qualifications and a serious amount of debt.
Why would so much money be needed? It is not an unrealistic estimation that many need it for for drug habits. These compulsions can drive addicts to do absolutely anything for a fix. It appears as a ‘last resort’ profession, like the phrase ‘being driven into prostitution.’ It can be safely assumed that the prostitute is not what they dreamt as a child. In buying the service of a prostitute, is it possible that you are funding a drug habit? Or could you be paying the school fees of children that can’t understand what their mother does? These are, after all, human beings.
3) It can be established that there is no sane reason to become a prostitute. If a woman is driven to become a prostitute by her addiction to sex, this still raises serious issues about her motives. Psychology has provided many explanations to sex addiction, and none diagnose it positively. It is an instinctual drive, perhaps driven by an extreme need for intimacy or dehumanisation, gained from suffering insufficient intimacy in childhood. I fail to see a sane explanation for women in prostitution.
4) But illegal prostitution is driving it underground! Many things are driven underground by their moral question-ability. Those fetishes that are too surreal for the whorehouse will be sought elsewhere. Child trafficking, rather unsurprisingly, is illegal. This means that it is underground, like German Nazi orgies or other seriously unusual practices. Just because they are underground, and are exploitative for example in child trafficking, does not mean that they should be brought into the open. They are still morally questionable, and in severe cases are hazardous to human life in cases of self-harm.
5) This is not however the same as abortion. When abortion was illegal there were deaths, as a result of young women of proud stock being desperate to keep from disgracing the family name. Its illegality did not send a firm message of it’s moral question-ability, as it instead forced girls to move in with their distant family and cover up the pregnancy and indeed the birth of a child. In cases like that of John Prescott’s wife Pauline, the child was never seen again. That is until in this case, the News of the World tracked the man down and told him on the doorstep that his mum was the wife of the Deputy Prime Minister. It would be traumatic for all people involved.
The clue is in the term ‘pro-choice’: While not anti-life, the perspective is giving the choice to women about what happens to their body. It is, after all, the mother that will bear most of the burden of child-rearing. Even today, child-birth has its risks, and is not to be entered lightly. Compare this with prostitution, and it is hardly the denial of a right that women need to decide how the rest of their life plans out. They are not forced into pain and suffering as a result of it being illegal, as in childbirth. Rather than the illegality denying women the choice, it is denying men the opportunity.
6) It can be said that prostitution is the result of the needs of men being met by the exploitation of women. Why, if a certain injustice was not being shown here, is there not an equal number of male prostitutes? How do women contain themselves and not demand a place that they can have sex without needing to know a guy? Not because they can ‘get it easier’ ordinarily than guys. It is because they are expected to put more effort into the emotional proximity with someone, an instinctive drive to gain trust and accountability.
In our civilised society, it should be assumed that this intimacy is necessary for both parties, and not just machines to carry out a biological process. All the reasons rape is wrong, in terms of the incorrect expression of primal desires, are exactly the same here. Men should get a hold of themselves, and get to know a person before moving straight to the maximum level of intimacy.
A better explanation of the issues surrounding abortion is found here:
There is an erroneous view that abortions are taken ‘lightly’ by flaky women that don’t bother with contraception. The truth is quite the opposite.
Taylor: I think I know what its about and if he doesnt hes an idiot. and thats all its supposed to include. me and him. the only reason ami is even in on this is because she started talking to him and hes using her as a therapist.
Simone: yes well now she feels like a carrier pigeon. i told her to stop
and what is it about that you know and he doesnt?
Taylor: its nothing that needs to be broadcast.
Simone: okay well both of you have lost the “main point”
because now its become an anger fest
Taylor: i dont think you know what your talking about simone.
Simone: taylor, i think you two are in a vicious cycle
Taylor: and i’d like to end it. he wont let me. so let it continue.
Simone: sit down and talk to him in person.
Taylor: I’d like to, he ignores me. ive thought of all of these options
Simone: but the reason why
he won’t is because all of these little issues between you two has built up around whatever the big issue is so whenever you attempt to confront the big issue, little issues have gotten in the way of solving that one big problem and then that cycle repeats itself.
so maybe you just need a way to get straight to the point and make it clear that is the only thing you will talk to him about.
dont bring up anything else.
i know you don’t think i know what i’m talking about taylor.
and not to sound like a smart ass but, in generalities, I know. in the specifics of what is causing this, no i don’t.
Simone: but i know more about generalities of people than any of you give me credit for. so i would take my advice. you’re welcome to go and be pissed at me now.
It’s like having all the right advice and not having anyone who’ll take it. I hope your ability to sense these things is valued by people one day. Don’t feel disheartened when people don’t realise what they’ve got.
I recently read the first of Barack Obama’s books, after doing it in backward order with Audacity of Hope first. I think I write too much about Obama on here, but ah well…
It was a really good book, one that made me think a lot about the culture that black people own, and should own because our forefathers robbed them of their history from Africa.
It got me thinking about black nationalism, and I used to be one of those people that thought it was unnecessary for governments like Britain and the US to apologise for slavery. Now I think they should, and rightly so. Slavery cannot be something that is ignored or swept under the carpet as an older generations mistake- Hitler’s treatment of the Jews as slaves and worse is an example of this.
So yeh Kudos to my brothers both black and white…
Soz bruv, didn’t see you post this. As I’ve said, the ‘Kenya’ part of Dreams From My Father is my favourite, because it is part of his quest to discover his origins. I’m not sure about governments apologising for slavery, though. If they apologise for that, why not all cruel deeds committed by previous administrations? The list would go on forever.
Rather than be sorry on behalf of dead men, what western countries should do is teach the truth about why they were wrong, and ensure that that state of mind never manifests itself again.
It’s a good book, and has certainly help me understand black identity and where Barack Obama is ‘coming from’. He does a lot to shed light on the ongoing racism of America, and that any anti-white racism stems only from their tortured souls. The sooner we build a more diverse and harmonious society, the better.
And kudos to our brothers indeed.
Since I got broadband internet of my own in September 2008 (late I know), I’ve done a lot of personality tests. They can be added to the list of things I am obsessed with.
But what are the fruits of these discoveries?
Keirsey Temperament Sorter (KTS-II)
This is one of the world’s most popular personality tests, though it isn’t the first I ever did. Apparently ‘Idealists’ are “passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self — always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination.” This explains why I do such meditation, trying to work out the consequences of my actions and change into a better person. I always try to learn the best way to live, it’s my favourite part of atheism: finding your own truth.
The test results mention that Idealists want to help people, and one type of Idealist is ‘the counsellor’. I’m pretty sure I want to do some kind of counselling, so it works.
“My Personality” Facebook Application
This isn’t a Facebook concept but the ‘Jungian Type’ as devised by Carl Jung. It is a highly recommended application, as it tests many other facets of personality as well. The four letters are made up of four ‘one or the other’ variables. The most important is the first, which is I for Introverted or E for Extroverted.
This article details more about the INTJ type. It details that INTJs are definite in their knowledge, to the point of appearing arrogant. But they also know what they don’t know, and seldom attempt to talk about what they don’t know. They are independent, incapable of small-talk, easily misunderstood and emotionally robust. They lack the ability to grasp social rituals though.
Star signs are pseudo-scientific, so I hesitate to support them, but they do sometimes provide details that explain behaviour. Astrology Online defines Pisces as a dreamer. Pisceans like to escape to the solitude of their own minds, as this can sometimes be more interesting than the external world. But as a result, there is often indifference to the world. They are also very imaginative, capable of great works of art. But they hate being criticised. Sound familiar, panchomanyeti?